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Saturday, August 30, 2008

Hmmmm, Drugs.

When I was on my mission in Peru an investigator once asked me if it was against the Word of Wisdom to self-medicate. At the time, and to be honest I still feel this way, I told her that for the most part it would be a bad idea, but the exception would be if you know what you have and what needs to be done to treat it. For example I always get an ear infection after I get a cold. Every time. So while I was in Peru and I began to feel the ear infection coming on I would go down to the pharmacy and buy 30 pills of 500 mg of Amoxicillin. I would then take those pills three times a day for 10 days. I knew this because every doctor I have ever known has given me that prescription and to this day that is what they prescribe (since here in the US we can't be trusted to have antibiotics on hand). So I know what I have and what has to be done.

The problem that I've come across lately is the OTC drugs. I don't know, I guess that I've come to take them for granted or at least think that if the government thinks that these are okay enough for any moron to buy then they must be safe. Since I've had a cold these past couple of weeks I've been trying (although not on purpose, or at least not with a full and rested mind) some different cocktails of these drugs and let me tell you. WEEEEEE!!!!! but not the 'weee' as if I want to do it again. Now that I'm finally coming off the cold, I can't sleep, so now I'm tempted to start taking some sleeping pills. It's so easy to fall into take-this-to-feel-better kind of thinking. Personally I don't like to be like that kind of thinking and I would go so far as to say that for me it's against the WOW.

Friday, August 29, 2008

Your a Sick, Sick Man!

Among all of the problems I have one of the most annoying ones is the fact that my body seems to have this problem processing vitamin C. I have to take at least 1000mg of vitamin C a day in order to have the proper amount everyone else seems to have as they go through life. The problem that comes from having this kind of problem is the fact that if I don't keep my vitamin C up then my body will not heal as quickly from daily cuts, scraps and bruises. On top of that it seems that every single strain of Cold out there is put on high alert and is given my home address no matter how many times I wash my hands. Once I get a cold than it's here to stay until I drown myself in fresh (not from concentrate) orange juice.

The big problem is above all, and you think it would be the easiest problem, is remembering that all I have to do is take Vitamin C everyday, especially when I'm sick. Once I start feeling like a normal human being I stop taking the vitamins and in a couple of weeks BAM! I'm sick with a cold and for some odd reason I can't seem to think through my Cold-like stupor that all I need to do is drink lots and lots of fresh (not from concentrate) orange juice. I would hope that my wife would remind me but I don't think she wants to because when I get sick I usually lie around for a while then suddenly I'll get, edgy, and when I get edgy I clean the house. This last round I've gone three weeks with a cold and finally my Mom reminded me to drink orange juice but by then I'd cleaned the living room, our bedroom, my daughter's room, and the downstairs playroom. And when I say cleaned, I mean I put everything away, wiped down the walls and shampooed the carpet. I guess I can't blame my wife for not pointing out the obvious while I'm sick, I'm such a good helper around the house.

Man, I hate being sick.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Attempting to be honest

So a little while ago I ordered some stuff for my bike online, I've done it several times and have never had a problem. When I got this particular package of the two items that I ordered. One of the items was not something I ordered, I was just going to send it back with the proper slip and ask for them to send the right part, but on a whim I called them first. I told them my problem and they said that it was no problem and that they would send the correct part out to me immediately and sorry for the inconvenience. I asked them if they wanted me to send the incorrect part back (secretly I was hoping to keep it because although it was not a part I had ordered I knew that it would certainly come in handy in the future) and they told me not to worry about it.

Now when they asked for the part number for the part that I was suppose to receive I was a little tired so I gave them the wrong number and so yet again they sent me the wrong part, but instead of the wrong part it was a copy of one of the parts I had already received, so I called them again and told them that I had screwed up and that I would be sending the correct part back and if they would please send me the correct part. I filled out the form and sent the repeat part back. A couple of days later I finally got the right part, a couple of days later I got a repeat of the part I just got. I assume that someone saw the form I filled out and assumed that the replacement part hadn't been shipped and then shipped it themselves.

So now here I am with the two right parts I ordered, one part I didn't order, and a repeat of a part that I did order. Sometimes I wish being honest wasn't so time consuming.

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Preschool and Kindergarden

My little girl has been going to preschool since she was about a year-and-a-half. You might be thinking 'how does a postal worker pay to have his year-and-a-half old daughter go to a preschool?' Well, welcome to the world of little known government programs and living in a bilingual household. For some reason the public school system hasn't figured out that a child can grow up in a bilingual household and learn to speak both languages just fine. They still seem to think that bilingual children need special help in their language development skills, and as I am not one to turn down cheap additional education for my kids I accepted. I feel sometimes that I should let them in on the joke that kids are quick learners but I'd hate to spoil the surprise.

So my little girl started kindergarten this week and for the very first time she cried when she went to school. After classes she told us that she cried because there were too many kids, 29 to be exact, and the teacher only gets one assistant. My goodness, I knew teachers were underpaid, but this seems to border on the ridiculous. My job isn't easy but I don't have 29 eager smiling faces looking to me to explain the work around them everyday of the week. Heck, I think that babysitters make more money when you break down the kid to guardian ratio. I hate to think that most if not all of these kids have only had home schooling up until now. At least I worry if their parents teach like me, because I have to idea how to teach. I usually just try to explain what I'd doing (or trying to do) and hope that some of it sinks in to my kids. My wife is usually the one that sits down and goes over the basic skills like that. Man, I love that woman.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

The Need for Sleep

I'm a grumpy person when I don't get enough sleep. The worse part is that I work at 2:00am so I have to go to bed in the middle of the afternoon, which is really hard when you are out and about with your family and you have to head back home so you can get to bed by 5:00pm, more often then not I can't do it and when I don't do it for a couple of nights my whole sleep schedule gets thrown out of whack and you don't even want to see me on a night (or day?) like that.

The problem is trying to remain calm when I have been running on three to four hours of sleep a night for a couple of nights. I just like spending time playing with my kids and having to say goodnight to them in the middle of the afternoon is gut wrenching, but if I don't get to sleep then I become as my daughter likes to call me 'an ogre'. Unfortunately my wife often gets the blunt end of my ogreness because when I am trying to sleep and the kids are being just kids then I will of course emerge from my cave and ask why she isn't doing more to keep the kids quiet when once I've had some sleep I realize that if I had only gone to bed earlier then the sounds the kids make wouldn't have waken me at all, after all I am a heavy sleeper.

This situation has Catch 22 written all over it. (A fine book I might add if you like dark humor) Miss time with your kids so you can sleep, don't sleep and eventually become grumpy with your kids. If only I didn't want to go back to school and just take a day job.

Friday, August 22, 2008

Problems with bieng bilingual

Most people like to congratulate my wife and I on the fact that we are doing our best to make sure our kids learn English (my native tongue) and Spanish (My wife's native tongue). In fact Spanish is all we speak at home. The problem that my wife and I are having is the constant struggle with our kids' vocabulary. As you can imagine our kids are surrounded by English, the TV, most friends, stores, school and my half of the extended family. Spanish has been grounded to Sunday meetings, some DVD's with the Spanish language track and the home. I will often have to teach my soon-to-be five-year-old daughter the translation of some word in English because if she doesn't know the Spanish equivalent then she will just use the English one. For example, "papa, pajaros tienen wings, no perros" Translation: Dad, birds have wings, not dogs.

I heard some time ago that Socrates said that a man that speaks two languages speaks with two souls. I've tried to verify this quote but to no avail. Nevertheless I like it so I quote it. The problem is that I think that there is an English side of my daughter that I don't know. I don't speak to her in English unless I have to but the other day my mother took my daughter out to go buy a birthday present and the little girl that my Mom described to me didn't sound like the daughter I know.

My Mom congratulated me on the way I was raising my daughter the day after she took her out. I asked why? And my Mom told me that when she took my daughter to Wendy's for lunch she asked her if she wanted apple sauce or french fries, and my daughter asked for apple sauce! Never in her entire life has my daughter ever asked for apple sauce, especially in the face of french fries. My mother also told me how my little girl started to tell her some knock, knock jokes. At this time I cannot express to you my surprise because my daughter has never told me a joke despite all the ones I tell her. I asked my Mom if she had picked up the right little girl.

Suddenly I've discovered that there is a whole other half of my daughter that I never knew. Obviously that Spanish side likes french fries and doesn't tell jokes while the English side eats apple sauce and is a stand-up comedian.

Saturday, August 16, 2008

How I came to know.

A dear friend of mine is going through a crisis of faith as he has never had before. I grieves me so that I cannot contain my disappointment with him as he shares with me his slowly degrading faith. I tried time and time again that there are things that are important and that he should spend his time with those things, I for one had a crisis of faith some time ago were I doubted but I will get to that in a minute, but he insisted that the things that he was concentrating on were important at least to him.

I did the standard thing to do in a situation like that and shared with him my testimony but that resulted very little in his way of thinking. I suggested that he return to the basics and study the Book of Mormon again and he stated that he understood the Book of Mormon enough. I cannot express in words how I lament for him at the way he allowed and continues to allow himself to be taken along this way whose path with certainly lead to nothing but more doubt and perhaps the destruction of the things he holds dear.

Some time ago starting before my mission and lasting during it my soul hungered. I had plenty of doubts. Something happened in my mission that I had to deal with on an almost daily basis and what had happened was so disturbing to my mind that my faith was shaken to the very core. For some reason though and I to this day do not remember who or why I was brought to recall the test that Alma tells the people, he tells them to compare the word of the Lord to a seed and plant it in your heart. I knew then that if I was to come to an understanding of whether the church was true and that the Book of Mormon was true I needed to live what was taught. I needed to go all the way and cast aside my disbelief and live what I was teaching, every last bit. Wouldn't you believe it that the words filled my breast as promised, but what I didn't expect was the fact that I didn't realize that my heart had been changed until I asked myself what I believed and when I really began to share it with others.

I wish that I could say from that point on I was as faithful as a member could be, but the fact of the matter is I'm not, I try but I often fail. The difference has become that I know that the church is true, God lives and the Book of Mormon is the word of God. That despite my failures I still know where I need to be heading. I sure hope one day I will be able to work out all the kinks in my life and maybe be a better example for my friend.

Friday, August 15, 2008

The key is to be humble and simply believe

Once upon a time I used to look at things in a very factual light. I would take whatever facts were available at the time and draw conclusions so that I might make informed decisions or at least as informed decisions as I could make at the time. Sounds like a good way to go about things doesn't it? For me at least it wasn't.

You see my wife is quite the character. I love her dearly even though she doesn't always think before she acts. In fact that is one of the many reasons I love her so much. She really is my better half. A problem that kept occurring when we first got married and come up from time to time is that certain unintentional conclusions can be drawn but what she does. Especially when it comes to me. She would do things from time to time that would leave me with the impression that I wasn't important or that the things I would say aren't important. It would drive me crazy while she would say "I don't do it on purpose." My response would usually be "Then try not doing it on purpose!"

This kind of thing continued for quite some time until one day I realized that I was somehow overlooking the fact that she loves me and trying to objectify it. Love cannot be objectified. Shouldn't I be able to take all of her actions and be able to draw the conclusion that she loves me? Why can't I just trust that she loves me and accept any oversights of hers as simple faults?

Once I began to humble myself before my wife did I finally begin to experience a love for her that I had not had before. Some might call it submission but for me it cries of faith.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Guilty as dreamt

I had a dream during my mission that caused me a lot of grief. It really racked my soul and I spent a lot of time trying to understand why I had this kind of dream. I cringe at the idea of writing what kind of dream it was but allow me to say that for a 20-year-old healthy male it shouldn't be a surprise. Yes, go ahead allow your minds to tip a toe into the gutter for a second just so you know what I am talking about. Got it, good.


Anyway, I was fraught with confusion on whether or not I had committed any kind of sin. I worked all day everyday with diligence in my perception and I never taught young women without the appropriate member present and in fact those lustful kind of thoughts never entered my mind during the day. So why did those ideas enter my head at night?

I had a long talk with my Mission President and he assured me that those kinds of dreams are normal for a boy my age and that as long as I was diligent not to occupy my mind with those kinds of thoughts then I would be just fine. I felt the calming presence of the spirit with these words so I knew that when it came to dreams I wouldn't be held accountable. (as long as I didn't concentrate on the content of said dreams)


Fast forward to a time when I'm happily married with two kids. From time to time my wife wakes up very upset with me. Often she will go several hours angry as she can possibly be and in her own passive aggressive way, punish me. I will spend all my mental abilities trying to understand what I did so I could hurry and apologize for it or at least know what to put on the 'I'm Sorry' card when I bring her flowers. Once I can pin my wife down I will find out that I did something in her dream that really upset her. Just the other day I guess I was really flirting with this young woman and I had made her a pair of pants and I was going over to her house to deliver them while my wife stayed home with the kids. She knows that I didn't really do those things but she says she can't help looking at me and remembering the horrible things I did in her dreams.

I guess sometimes I'll be held accountable for what I do in dreams. For the most part my wife will now openly accuse me so I can start apologizing from the time she wakes up in the morning.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Dr. Me and Mr. Sin

Isn't it horrible that as you get older you finally realize all the really good stuff is also really old? Take classic movies for example, the other night as a family we watched I was a Male War Bride with Cary Grant and just the week before we saw An Affair to Remember with Cary Grant. What incredible films! No bad language, no crass humor and the most respectful references to sex (You won't even know it's there unless you are looking for it, and even then it might not be there). I hate to think that there are people out there that have never seen these movies and my not realize that movies can be made this way.



Now let's take classic books. I read Sherlock Homes: The Hound of the Baskervilles and was surprised at how delightful Sherlock was for the first time in my life. I read Animal Farm by George Orwell and I was blown away by his understanding of communism and the USSR. Then I read Crime and Punishment and was extremely impressed by the understanding of the author of the mindset of a man who is doing everything to move on with his life despite the fact that he knows that he will soon be caught for his crimes. The most recent book that I've read that really made and impression on me was Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.

I will admit, although not surprisingly, that at a point in time in my life I had allowed sin to take a starring role in my life. Since that time I have looked back and marvelled at the way that sin worked itself into my life only to one day take it over. When I read Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde it represented my plight with sin almost perfectly. I want to explain all the details but I really would like everyone that can read the opportunity to read it. To some it will seem obvious but for people like myself it may just end up being a revelation of sorts.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Double checking the facts

Again in my study of the scriptures I came across something that I hadn't considered before. Well, I guess you can say that I had considered it but now more than ever it stands out to me. I was reading in First Nephi Chapter 10, verse 17. Nephi had just heard his father speak about his dream and a couple of things concerning the Jews, but after he had heard all that he wanted to pray about it, so he could know for himself about these things.

I couldn't believe that in all the times I had read this passage it never jumped out at me like this. Nephi with all his faith and having spoken to angels still wanted to pray about the things his father had told him and wanted confirmation from the Holy Ghost.

Lately I have been involved in a discussion about what to do if a Bishop is telling you things you don't agree with. Suddenly there is the answer, you pray about it. I guess I've just heard it so many times that I've taken it for granted. It seems to me that God doesn't hold it against you as a lack of faith to come to him to double check what you've heard, in fact it appears that he encourages it.

My wife tells me that in her home country everytime she would talk to the Bishop he would tell her to go and pray about the things that they had talked about. I think all Bishops should say that to everyone they consult.

If I keep my line of communication open with the Lord I can preserve myself from the very same people who come to church that might lead me astray.

Monday, August 11, 2008

Love thine enemies as thyself

Among all of my faults the one that irritates me the most about myself is my inability to forgive my enemies. And when I say that I have a problem forgiving them it's more of a problem of not planning ways to hurt them every time they come to mind or when I see them.

I have two primary enemies in my life that I have to make a conscious effort not to hate and/or hit every time I come across them. One of my enemies is a company that is only a block away from my work that practically stole $50 from me. They sweet talked my wife into letting them do something and they told her it was for free, to make a long story short it wasn't and we had to pay. I called every company in existence that I thought could help me but with no luck. I could have sued them for the $50, but come on, I would pay $50 not to have that kind of headache. So they kept my money. Now every time I go past their place of business I think of all the vengeful things I could do to make sure they couldn't keep my $50. Throw a rock through the window, put a padlock on their gate, smear some kind of horrible substance on their windows or just simply flip them the bird every time I go by.

I'll be honest. Those kinds of thoughts are not christen to say the least and when you read that you should love thine enemies as thyself it sure seems hard to swallow, at least it this case. So what do I do? I know they deserve it, I want to do it and if I don't no one will. Am I suppose to just let that kind of injustice stand and allow these thieves to go on their merry way? When I pray about it, yes. Perhaps with time I will be able to bike past their place of business and not wish I had a rock.

Saturday, August 9, 2008

But, we heeded them not

Isn't it curious when you are praying and racking your brain for some bit of understanding suddenly it just comes around the corner and says hello and wants to take you out for lunch?

Since I enjoy blogging on a regular basis I surf around some sites that perhaps at one point I will have up on my blogroll. While I read these posts about the LDS faith I am often bothered by flippant way some people take their faith. I am very troubled by the way some people respond to people of faith (no matter what religion they are). I would read the way some people would express themselves about a religious topic, I would put my two cents in and no matter what, the other person would rip my opinion apart. I found myself spending more time just repeating what I had said, in a foolish attempt to clarify, only to be ripped apart again.

As of late I have become envious of the way these people are able to make their argument and I wished that I could have the right words in my mouth, or on my screen, that would set the argument to rest and be able to confound my enemies as it were. So, I took my problem to prayer and this morning in my somewhat daily scripture study I came across 1 Nephi Chapter 8. It the part with Lehi's dream and Lehi is talking about how the people in the great and spacious building were making fun of the people that ate the fruit and he said 'But, we heeded them not.' I took this as an answer to my prayer.

I believe that if I would be a good tool for the Lord to be able to say things to confound my enemies I must first heed not what they say. In other words I shouldn't be concerned about how they may respond to my beliefs or the beliefs of others, I should first allow my words to stand on their own. Perhaps in time the Lord will instill in me the desire to respond and confound but for now, I should heed them not.

Friday, August 8, 2008

Starting out

To be perfectly honest I'm not new to blogging. In fact I've been doing it off and on (More on the off) for about two years. I have a political commentary blog and a more journalistic blog, and by journalistic I mean a blog that feels more like a dairy than anything else. These blogs have filled something within me, but I felt and feel a need for a blog that reaches into the daily struggle of a Mormon Father that is trying to do his best in the small corner of the Universe that the Lord has allotted him.

So welcome to my blog, were I want to share with you a much more personal view of a Mormon Lifestyle.